Who you are being is more fundamental than what you are doing

Posted: April 24th, 2009 | Filed under: insights | Tags: personal development | No Comments »

There are two fundamental aspects to character; and to achieve a fulfilling life and create your true impact on the world, it is important every day to be honest with ourselves on how we are doing on these two: 1. Doing the things that have to be done 2. How we relate to the world around us Doing the things that have to be done One of the secrets of success is doing the stuff than others shun.  If you look at any great man or woman, anyone who has ever achieved anything you admire, chances are that their path to greatness was full of facing up to difficult situations, doing the boring stuff late into the night.  They “felt the fear and did it anyway”.  Doing the stuff you don’t like is usually about laying the groundwork, a solid foundation for your unique talents.  It’s hard to be the best designer in the world if you can’t pay your bills because you are “too busy” to invoice.  It’s hard to be the mum you want to be if you are really tired and worried what your partner might say when you ask him to share more of the housework. Do the things you don’t want to do, do them every day and three things will happen: 1) you will have less nasty stuff to deal with because you are “oiling the machine of your life” and so it will run more smoothly; 2) the more you face up to the less daunting things, situations, and people seem;  3) you will have more energy and positivity. Doing some of the stuff you don’t like every day, no matter how big or small – that’s how you build a character that will elevate you to greatness. How we relate to the world around us With character comes great responsibility (to misquote Superman).  How you choose to be throughout the day will fundamentally shape the world. It’s Monday morning, you haven’t really woken up yet, you had a row with your husband last night, and now you have a meeting with one of your reports who hasn’t been performing that well.  Do you A) berate them for their poor work, take out your frustrations on them and feel bad about it later, or B) put your personal irritations to one side and open the meeting with the question “How do you feel things have been going and how can we work together to get the most out of each other?”  Yes, we’ve all done both but we all know that B is most likely to produce the best result for everybody (you’ll feel less grumpy too). Who you are being is more fundamental than what you are doing.  Have the discipline, the strength of character to continually ask yourself “How am I being in this situation”  and if you don’t like the answer, then you certainly won’t like the result.  As we have seen here, who you are being shapes the reality of your world. I’d love to hear your character-building stories.

---